Mama’s reflection #14

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Good evening everyone. I’m feeling surprisingly upbeat this evening considering how busy this weekend has been and how the week ended.

We’ve had a very very busy weekend and I almost feel like the 3 of us could do with some time to ourselves to just chill out before we all head back to work and play this week. Yesterday sprog and I visited the library but I’ve already written about how much I enjoyed that here. We then walked to meet hubby at the car boot where he had done a stellar job of loading and unloading the car reading to sell our wares. We just needed to try and make some space as we don’t have much storage space so whilst it pained me to give up some of sprog’s clothes, I know that they will quickly be replaced. I’m excited to be able to use the funds that we gained yesterday to start planning his birthday party with!

Today has been another busy day and, for me, a difficult balancing act between mama and teacher. I had to mark a set of exercise books for my year 10s. I’d promised them a couple of weeks ago and then been ill and they’d written homework essays during that time too. I knew it was a big job and had been putting it off. We also had the baptism of our friends’ little girl to go to so cue crazy times of marking and running round getting all of us ready to go out this morning. On days like this, I am so thankfulbthat hubby will step up and take the weight a little. He gave me an extra hour to work this afternoon and then I found my mama magic and worked like a machine! So I am happy to say that the books are marked and I can go to bed without worrying about breaking my promise to 28 kids, again!

Unfortunately, I’ve also had some bad times this week. Friday was really difficult for me to manage. One of my closest friends fathers passed away and it upset me hugely. In different ways to how I had imagined that it would. The news was not unexpected, but it hit me and shook me as I thought, I think for the first time, that one day (if the universe and God play as they should) I will leave this world and leave sprog behind. I have found it very difficult to digest this as I can’t imagine not seeing him live his life in full. I pray that we are given the greatest gift of all which is time together; that I am able to watch him grow and support him until he is his own man, strong, capable and caring. Even considering that, I don’t want to ever leave him. I have slowly come to peace with it by knowing that if/when (and hopefully, many many years from now) I do have to go, I will be able to watch over him and guide him from a peaceful place and that he will know how much I love him and that I am always there for him.

So there we have it, a very reflective reflection from this week… A week where I have had true highs and true lows. I hope you have had a lovely week and that you have many positive things to look forward to.

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