The boy only wants his Daddy

Last week was great. Last week was half term and I got to spend so much time with my lovely little man. Last week I got to be a good Mama and a good wife. Last week was last week.

This week, I am none of those things. This week, I left the house 10 minutes after Sprog woke up on Monday morning. This week, I didn’t see him at all Tuesday evening. This week he doesn’t want to know me.

Sprog has always been a bit of a Daddy’s boy but this morning I have full on working Mama guilt as I haven’t seen him much at all this week and he was letting me know that this morning. We had full floods of tears when Daddy wasn’t the one to get him out of bed this morning, when Daddy didn’t come to get him dressed, and when Daddy wasn’t the one to play with him. Mama didn’t get a look in on cuddles, play time, morning routine at all. Mama got pushed away and screamed at.

I can reason and I know that he doesn’t mean it in a nasty way. I know that it is him sticking to what is familiar. But I am the one who wants to cry and hissy fit too. It’s really not my fault that I haven’t been there. Without boring you, I had reports due in for Year 8, Year 9 parents evening and a remote access system that wouldn’t let me in from home over the holiday so no lessons ready to go for Monday morning, hence the early start.

My heart is absolutely breaking this morning. I want him to want and need me in the morning. Not his Daddy, not all the time at least. I am regularly the parent who gets pushed away, the one who he doesn’t want, the one who feels like a sh** parent because of it.

There wasn’t really a point to this post, it was more that I needed to get this off my chest. I’m just feeling awful this morning, a bit like I want to walk out of work and not have to come back. Today is a day that I will feel jealous of all the part-time working Mama’s and SAHM’s out there. If you are one of those lucky people, do me a favour?! Today, have as many hugs with your small people as possible and be thankful that you are with them because today, I’d love to be you.

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12 thoughts on “The boy only wants his Daddy

  1. Oh no sweetie, I’m sorry to hear you are going through this right now. It happened to me a while back and I know it was the most heartbreaking period feeling that rejection. You do know that it’ll come back round and that he will want you, you just have to give him time to forgive you! When I went away on conferences with my old company, Zach took a while to forgive me. In fact, upon first seeing me he would cry and hover by his Nannie or Daddy, whoever was there. It’s heart wrenching and so difficult. You know that he loves you because you are his wonderful mummy but they go through these periods. I got to spend all day yesterday with Zach but only because he was poorly. Back in the office today and he’s with nannie. Rubbish isn’t it?! xxx

    • Oh, it’s just been going on for so long that it drives me mad sometimes. Sometimes, I can joke and see that it’s ok. This morning, I just couldn’t. It’s just so hard after having half term with him and seeing how wonderful he is all the time. It’s just a sad Mama day today

  2. I’ve been going through the exact same thing with my little girl since before Christmas so know how awful it feels to be rejected. I fractured my heel on Boxing Day as well so have been at home since but not able to do alot/everything I usually do so Daddy has been spending even more time with little miss and I’ve felt totally useless and unwanted. Stick at it through because I’m now seeing the light at the end of the tunnel and I do now get a look in inbetween the screams of daddy and want daddy. I’ve written a blog post about this and done lots of research and thankfully most articles say it will be a phase. Its the hardest thing being a working mum but I’m sure you are doing a great job and hope things get better for you soon x

  3. I’m so sorry to hear this. I am on maternity leave at the moment and this is one of the things I think a lot about. Thank you for sharing. Big hugs xx

    • I’ve been back at work for almost a year and I would say that this is probably 1 of a handful of times that I’ve felt this bad for going to work so it’s not all bad, it’s just a really tough day today.

  4. Bless you, I have had many occasions like this when my boy only wants his Daddy and it’s heartbreaking at times, I just tell myself that he loves us both it’s just he’s a Daddy’s boy. Lots of hugs XX

  5. Sending you *a great big squishy hug*!
    I feel your pain honey. Yes I know I’m a SAHM but if I’m honest I too get pushed away by Ella and I’ve been told she doesn’t love me because I shout at her. The day after her first sleepover she said she wished Steph {her friend’s mom} was her mom, nice huh! This completely shattered my heart and made me feel like the worst mom in the whole wide world….
    Anyhoo my point is this can happen regardless of if you’re a working or a SAHM!
    Try to keep your chin up hon and remember your little one doesn’t mean anything by it and loves you dearly!xx

  6. I am sorry you are having such a rough day. I remember having times like this when I worked full-time. My daughter did have moments when she wanted her daddy only but I needed her love too. This moment will pass and be history. Tomorrow is a new day. Please take care of yourself.

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